As I roll toward yet another birthday, I realize I have learned a lot of things in my old age (usually the hard way). Life is full of lessons. It seems the internet has a ton of these lists, and I am here to share mine. Perhaps I have too much time to think, and this is more of a “life lessons” journal for my own purposes. These are just some of the things I have been mulling over as I barrel toward old age.
Most lessons of life are learned the hard way. Even if you are some 20-year-old who reads everything on the internet, it will be hard to comprehend a situation until you lived it. Still, if I can help someone from being totally blindsided this post is worth writing. Considering everything I went through these past two years, I have the scars to at least add value. Do as I say, not as I did! I started this blog because I lost everything... since then, the hits just keep on coming (both good and bad). Here are my ramblings about the things I learned in the past 46 years.
Time Goes by Quickly
This one is a real unique nugget of wisdom; I am sure you never heard that before. It is a cliché, but it is extremely accurate. Your days will feel like they drag on, but once you get into a routine, you blink, and the year is over. Time does not care if you have achieved what you wanted, it keeps rolling. In the next five years you can either be poorer, fatter, and more miserable or you can take steps to improve your life. All those reruns of the Office do not mean shiite, what matters is living a fulfilling life. Time can be a real bastard. Especially when you hit thirty, you turn around and you will be 45. You will see your parents and realize they are old. Hell, you will look at yourself and see an older version. Of all the things I have learned it is to act like time is flying, because time is flying. Life Lesson: Act with a sense of urgency
Life will Change in the Blink of an Eye
This post is real upbeat isn’t it. Fuck maybe I will add a picture of a kid burying his kitten to bring your spirits up. Sorry, it is the mood I am in. Everything you hold dear can be taken away from you, nothing is guaranteed to be forever, no matter how good it seems. You can and should do things to protect the important aspects of your life, yet no matter how much insurance you have it may not be enough. Not to say you are a victim, just that control isn’t always yours.
One day you are going through your daily routine, petting the dog, kissing the wife, the next you are in a little condo, single, broke. People you care about will die, layoffs will happen, wives will cheat. No persons perfect life goes untouched. Yes, some of us have more of these situations, but we all will have them.
Sometimes change will be something good, new job, girl, dog etc… Who am I kidding? The surprises tend to lean more toward the bad. That’s fine, it makes you stronger. Just remember no matter how good things seem, prepared to get blindsided. Life Lesson: Prepare the best you can for the worst
Take Care of Your Health
There is a quote “a healthy man wants a million things; an unhealthy man wants just one”. Of all the things I have learned, this stuck with me. Nothing else matters if you are not healthy. Poor health limits what you can do, how you feel, oh and can kill you. I know people who skipped important procedures for bullsh*t meetings at their job. Well, who is going to be in the meeting when they are dead?
Nothing, not your job, money, or even family trumps your health. You are not in a position to help anyone if you are ill. Yet most people don’t care, they will spend 10 hours working and not one in the gym. They eat terrible office food because it is free. Last I checked Cardiologist don’t work for nothing. Start putting first things first, and take care of your health every day, which leads to my next point. Life Lesson: It all starts and ends with your health
Daily Actions are What Matters
This is one of those life lessons that resonates with me. It is what you do every day that matters. If you want to be a writer, write daily. A runner, run daily, you get the point. You are a sum of your daily actions. You might not notice any progress at first, because change takes time.
So many people give up because they think they are not making any progress. They believe it is a waste of time. Yet will commit 20-hours a week to watching television. Spend some time daily to get better and you will improve. As mentioned in the first thing I learned, time flies. Those positive days will add up and you will be happier for the action you take.
Of course, the reverse is also true. Eat a cheeseburger, nothing happens. Eat one every day and you will look like Lizzo. You could either be moving forward or backward. The universe does not care which you choose. Life Lesson: Your daily actions predict who you are
Do Not Do What is Easy
I so wanted to watch YouTube and eat pasta today. It is raining, sure as hell did not want to jump in the car, face terrible traffic after a 9-hour day to workout. Easy gets you nowhere. Easy is what the average idiot on the street does.
Anything worthwhile takes effort. Starting with a degree. Accounting, Engineering, I still think finance (but some would disagree) these are all difficult. Sociology is not hard. I can say with confidence your life will be harder for taking the easy way out. One of the things I have learned about life is that you get what you put into it. Half arse effort gets you a half arse result. To put it another way, if you want a hard life, keep doing easy things. Life Lesson: Doing easy things leads to a hard life
People are Really Stupid
Not you… you got here, you’re not stupid. I am talking about most other people. Some times I just marvel about how brain dead the average person is. I am around Joe six packs every day, stuck with those same dumb conversations; how we ever split the atom is beyond me. Really listen to what people are saying. The majority of those around you are not independent thinkers, they are being fed information. Hell, a survey even said that most Americans get their news from Facebook. Talk about being fed information. Your average person is a shell…
The outcome of their life proves this. How is it that even today 64% of people live paycheck to paycheck? Some of it is bad luck, most of it is not having the basic knowledge of how money works. Yes, school does a terrible job explaining these things, but one can learn through various media sources. Yet, most can’t tell the difference between a bond and stock, at the same time somehow know the name of the backup QB on their local sports team. It is pathetic, some many people have no knowledge and critical thinking skills, just accept this. Life Lesson: Have no trust in the intelligence of those around you.
Have Little Faith in Authority
One of the major things I have learned in the last two years is most authorities do not know what they are talking about. Lucky for them the system keeps them in power. So many various institutions are just terrible at their job, yet they carry this air of superiority over us common folk.
I am not saying there are no experts in any subject, I am saying pick the right ones, not the people propped up by the various media sources. Whether it is money, health, hell even traffic patterns, take what you are being fed with a grain of salt. Most of these people have not taken the time to critically think about their position, or worse have an inflated self-worth in which they cannot be wrong. Regardless of their poor track record they are smug.
Take investing for example. Most people do not take the time to learn about finance, so they take advice from “experts”. They pay a small commision or listen to them intently on CNBC, they are authorities after all. Yet, the vast majority of hedge fund and portfolio managers underperform the general market. So random stock picks will actually do better than these bloated “experts”. I can bring in other examples, such as the medical authorities out there, we all witnessed how fallible they were over the last two years. Life Lesson: Just because someone went to school for something, it doesn’t mean they know what they are talking about.
Know who Your Friends Are
I recently lost a good friend. The kind of guy that made me want to be a better friend and person. That puts things into perspective. You realize who you can count on in this world and I will say there are not a lot of people who fit that description. There are those in this world who you think are your friends. Are they lifting you up? Are they making you a better human?
Or are these people you go to the bar with twice a week and talk about sports. People who have no problem with you being drunk every night. Really so they have someone to share their own miserable lives with. The bars near me are full of drinking buddies. There was a bunch of people who I saw once or twice a month when I went out. By no means would I call them friends, but I thought we were cool given I have hung out with them 6 or 7 times. On a lark I asked each one a simple question. What is my name? Not one could answer. These are not friends (and never will be). These are people to wallow in misery with.
This could also be said about coworkers. I can count on one hand the number of friends I have made from work. That is why I say don’t be friends with people at the job. Every time I left a company, people I saw everyday were never seen again. These were “friends” because they were forced next to you. I would never choose most of them in real life. You know when you have a real friend. Life Lesson: Know and appreciate your real friends, discard the rest.
Watch Your Addictions
What are you addicted to? You are addicted to something even if you do not know it. All addictions can ruin a man’s life. Some worse than others. There are the obvious things like drugs and alcohol and yet others that aren’t so clear. When I go out if it is a Tuesday or Saturday the same people are drinking, usually until closing time. I only go out once or twice a month, these people are there daily. Yet I had other addictions.
Admittedly I would get lazy some days. Well, a lot of days. Endlessly scrolling through YouTube or Netflix, armed with a bunch of unhealthy food I would turn off my brain. Recently I gave up all streaming services and TV, it is eye opening. At first (and still at times) my mind is almost in turmoil because I cannot turn it off. It is a stark realization as to exactly why I had to stop.
What are you doing to escape reality? One of the things I have learned is we all do something (or multiple things). Is it Porn, social media, or is it a particular person who you obsess over? Are you one of those guys always trying to get a girlfriend? These are questions you need to ask yourself. Is there something in your life you are using to turn off your mind? Life Lesson: Look for addictions that distract you from reality.
Live Like Your Dying
Even though I write like I am one problem away from French kissing a shot gun I love living. So many of us aren’t though. We are going through the motions. Living in someday land. Someday I will travel, get into shape etc…, but that never comes. It goes back to my first point, time flies.
Time does not give a rat’s arse what you do, it will keep moving. You might as well live your life. If you do not set and move in the direction you want your existence will be a prison. Take the time to really enjoy every day. Build the life you want or at least attempt to. Things will not be perfect, but effort goes far. Do your best to create the life you want. Life Lesson: Work at getting what you really want or live like the mindless drones you see throughout your day.
Conclusion: Ten Things I have Learned in the Past 46 Years
That is all I got for you. Those are the things I have learned. Well, I have about 100 more, but I told you ten and my hand is starting to hurt so that’s all you get. I have no idea if this sounded like some divine wisdom or the ramblings of an aging man, so let me know in the comments below. Too much time to think certainly made me ponder a lot of things. These are the ones you get until my 47th birthday.